Squirrel Wars 6: A Draw?

 

The Squirrel Wars Continue

I’ve reached a draw. I think. I bought the above feeder hoping that, with a squirrel baffle, it would make a difference. It didn’t…and by now I should not be surprised. After they figured out how to hang upside down on this feeder—squirrel baffle notwithstanding—and destroyed my ostensibly squirrel-proof next attempt (see the fifth installment), I emptied it and transferred the peanuts to this one:

This feeder is sold by Audubon, who ought to know what they’re doing since they’re in the business of birds. And to be fair, they must be on the right track. I haven’t had a single squirrel in my yard since I put this feeder up and filled it with shelled peanuts. They just can’t get at them. The only furry critters in my yard now are rabbits and chipmunks, and I don’t mind either of them because neither chews through my supply in two days.

Yay? Or Not.

Unfortunately, while squirrels couldn’t access the peanuts, neither could the birds. The outer cage is too small for squirrels to get through, yes—but it’s also not big enough for a bird to get peanuts out of the mesh inner “sleeve.” The birds small enough to get through the cage simply aren’t strong enough to pull a peanut out. Good attempt, Audubon, but it needs some tweaking if you’re going to market it as a peanut feeder.

I will keep this feeder, but it’s going to have to house suet nuggets or hulled sunflower seeds, because anything smaller will just fall right through the mesh inner “sleeve.” I transferred the peanuts back to the first feeder pictured and decided to let the squirrels who arrive to eat them, have their win. Once I run out of peanuts, however, they’ll have to find their pickings elsewhere. The feeders I currently have seem to be worth keeping for squirrel prevention. Good thing my neighborhood doesn’t get bears!

Maybe I can call this a win? 😅

Squirrel Wars 5: They’re Ba-a-a-ack

Why? Why-y-y-y-y?

Some of you may remember my posts about the Squirrel Wars from several years ago (and if you don’t, they’re entertaining reading). The more astute among you may note that the posts ranged over many years. This is the fight of the suburbanite: to forever participate in the battle between the furry little rodent and your birdseed.

FYI, the squirrel usually wins.

We had reached something of a draw when I bought a hopper feeder whose pan slams shut when anything heavier than a small bird sits on the perch. They took a while before figuring out they could hang from the top and acrobatically grab a bite to eat without touching the pan. Meh. At least they’re not eating it in two days.

The suet, meanwhile, is safe, between the cage and the squirrel baffle covering it so they can’t drop down on top of it like furry little commandos.

Problem solved, more or less…until the tree planted beside my hopper feeder got so big it was obscuring the feeder and providing them a handy branch to climb along to get to the hopper pan.

New plan: hang my tube-style cage feeder from Stokes (like this one) in the tree.

Didn’t take the little monsters long to learn how to shake the tree limb until lots of seed falls out—when, of course, they’re not reaching through the so-called squirrel-proof cage to pick seeds out. These marketers need to learn how to say resistant instead of proof…and I’m not sure “resistant” is even accurate. Might be smart to make the cage deeper so the seed tube is out of reach too.

To be fair, I had a tray out all winter where I was feeding peanuts to whatever showed up.  My visitors, furry and feathered, were making a mess of the deck, so I moved to a mesh tube peanut feeder and hung that in the tree. This is the result after a week:

So I wired the poor thing back together as best I could, then added a squirrel baffle on top of it. And this is the result after the following week:

I’m not sure what will stop these evil geniuses at this point. This was my next attempt, and it took him less than an hour to hang upside down on it and eat (at this point, it’s something of an experiment and academic curiosity, to see if anyone has made a feeder that ruins a squirrel’s thievery):

My brother has wire shepherd’s hooks on which he hangs his feeders, and he hangs a Slinky around the pole, the idea being the little buggers can’t climb the pole because the Slinky startles them and/or ruins their chances at getting a purchase. They just fall back off. FYI, you can get a “Squirrel Slinky”—made by Slinky—for $18 on Amazon, or you can just get three of the original aluminum toy ones for about $11 total. Same difference. Marketers. SMH.

I have one last attempt on order from Amazon. Stay tuned to see if I succeed! (P.S. I’m starting to admire squirrel ingenuity. If you are, too, give a look at Mark Rober’s Backyard Squirrel Maze.)

Squirrel Wars 4: Shake It Up, Baby

Those little stinkers.

One of the squirrels broke a feeder I had under a squirrel baffle by knocking it off the hook (from the ground). Bye-bye, seed. I bought a couple of nice Polywood bird feeders because of their mesh-bottom design, which helps air get into the seed, and moisture get out, thus avoiding seed mold. I figured I would never have to buy a feeder again, since these will also never crack or split.

Guess what?

I have five (count them, five) Gray Squirrels raiding my feeders. This is what's left of what seed I had in one of my feeders.

Those little so-and-sos just shake the feeders until the seed all falls onto the ground, and then eat it up. Sigh.

My next plan is to buy a pole that I can set in the middle of the yard, away from the little fiends' jumping-off points, on which I can mount the hopper feeder, thus foiling their ability to shake all the seed out of it. If anyone knows of a good way to squirrel-proof an entire yard, I'm listening.

Monsters.

Squirrel Wars 3: Fuzzy Strikes Back

They're at it again.

After the rousing success of my squirrel-proof suet feeder (not for lack of their trying, mind you; the thing's covered in tiny scratches from their foiled attempts at opening the cage), Fuzzy and his gang regrouped. They have taken to shaking the squirrel-proof tube feeder so that some of its contents will spill to the ground, and they can feast. They are also still hanging upside-down from the roof of my squirrel-proof hopper feeder, and scooping out bits of the food within. Smart little suckers, ain't they? It still takes them quite a while to make any sort of dent in the seed, though, so I suppose I should take my victories as they come.

But Fuzzy's not done tweaking my nose yet.

Yesterday, the Greenwood family spent the afternoon at the local zoo (which, by the way, is still fun in winter, especially if you're one of the penguins - one of them spent a good ten minutes showing off for my son, who loved it). When we arrived home, Fuzzy and one of his little lookouts (or maybe his squirrel hitman) had found their way into our trash can, and were fast making off with the remains of a tortilla. They scattered once we got out of the car, but this time, I just shook my head, pulled out the rest of the tortilla, and dropped it on the ground for them. (It's gone as of this morning, in case you wondered.) You may have won this time, Fuzzy, but I will prevail!

Squirrel Wars 2: Revenge of the Fuzzballs

OK, now that I have the birdseed situation ironed out and squirrel-proofed (the Squirrel-Proof Tube Feeder is working - see Squirrel Wars), I have to contend with what the lil' monsters are doing to my suet - as in, eating it in 3 days. At ten bucks a case, I am going to be eaten out of suet and home by the end of the winter. I had - sort of - outsmarted them by using these ingenious little screw-shut chain links, called Quick Links:


and though they try like heck, they haven't managed to open my suet cages. That doesn't stop them wolfing it down faster than a blue-ribbon champ at a pie eating contest. Help, gods of wildlife management, what's a girl to do?

Enter my hero, the unimposing but brilliant Squirrel-Proof Suet Cage:


Hooray! My sleek, wiry green hero, whatever did I do until you came along? This feeder works on the same principle as the tube feeder. Small birds can get through the baffle to dine on the suet, but Evil Grey Fuzzball cannot vanquish the wire to suck down the goods. (Note that I still have to screw it shut with its silvery sidekick, Quick Link.)

Both these nifty gadgets, and the tube feeder as well, are available at Tractor Supply. If you're a birder, it's well worth checking them out. Go, go! Defend your yard against the Squirrel Army of Doom!

All is well now in Greenwood House. I can't wait for spring, so I can sit out there with my coffee again and watch the birds visit - and actually get to eat something.

Squirrel Wars

(Or, How A Little Fuzzy Grey Mammal Shouldn't Be Smarter Than Humans, But Is)

I am in the midst of that great perennial battle--Human vs. Squirrel. Several years ago, when my husband and I bought our house, I was big-eyed with dreams of turning my backyard into a miniature nature preserve. I set out a nice new (standard hopper-style) bird feeder expecting to see all the pretty birds show up to eat and to listen to their tweets and chirps over my morning coffee.

No dice. Grey Squirrel shows up, pops the top off my feeder, eats the whole batch in two days.

Okay, I said. Let's try something different. I bought a tube-style feeder and a pole, and some suet cages.

No dice. Grey Squirrel shows up, knocks down the tube feeder, opens it, eats everything. Just for good measure, he opens the suet cages and eats that too.

Hmm. Not to be denied, I re-hang the feeder and suet cages, using floral wire to keep the cages shut and the feeder on the hook.

This time he breaks the wire and gets everything anyway--suet, birdseed, my pride, you name it.

Okay, you fuzzy little guerrilla birdseed eater, I'm gonna fix your wagon. I went to the hardware store and bought a few of those single chain-links that you have to screw shut. NOW the little monster can eat my suet, but at least he can't open the cages and gulp it down in one day. It takes him a few, but hey, I'll take what I can get at this point. Try that on for size, Mr. No-Opposable-Thumbs!

On to the feeders. I like goldfinches, and this little bugger's not gonna keep me goldfinch-less. I find a cone-shaped thistleseed feeder that's made of steel and heavy-duty screen wire. The birds can cling right to it to munch away. A-ha! GS leaves it alone! I get pretty yellow birdies! (Maybe he just doesn't like thistleseed.)

Okay, I said. What about the other feeder? I dispense with the tube feeder and blow a chunk of change on a squirrel-resistant hopper feeder that slams shut when GS's weight plunks on it. Hooray! It works! More birdies! Then one day I see GS hanging upside-down from the feeder roof and chomping merrily away at what's in the pan. Arggh. "Resistant." Not "proof." Well, we're aiming for almost perfect anyway now.

Then, hoping for some different birds, I try adding a wire basket-style feeder that you fill with sunflower seed. GS is showing signs of being Houdini reincarnated now. Two days after hanging it, he has figured out how to unhook the lid latches, flip the thing open, and chow down on the contents. And he got on his little squirrel Blackberry and texted his pals, because now there are three of them.

Scream.

I am now trying a feeder that claims to be squirrel-proof. It says so right on the box, and there's a picture of smiling people and lots of birdies flitting around the contraption. It's a tube feeder with a cage around it, so GS can't stick his head in there and suck down my sunflower seeds like a furry little vacuum cleaner.

I am not convinced.

There is a flaw in this lovely design. The top, which they claim "locks," just sets down on the top of the tube--somewhat snugly, but you see where I am going with this. There is no padlock on this sucker. And I think GS might be working out how to mutate his little paws into something with opposable thumbs at this very moment.

I will keep you posted. But if you hear screaming, it's me, overrun by Squirrelfest.